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» A New Strategy

My mother-in-law drives me crazy She antisocial critical know-it-all can't find anything decent say anyone herself Every time she comes visit puts a damper my relationship my wife takes
us days recover.

We never really gotten along lately gotten much worse She left yesterday a week's visit my wife I didn't talk rest day

My mother-in-law barely gets along her own sisters live next door her she estranged her own mother She only two friends whole world social life She spends hours day watching television doing genealogy research

When we got married 11 years ago she said Don't call me mom don't expect me love my own children

She divorced her husband eight years four children She then devoted her life her kids exclusion rest world She constantly talks we can should our house our property our money Every time she comes over she points out things she thinks wrong our house.

final straw came her second last visit She blamed me telling her park a train station where she got a parking ticket I wasn't her time I didn't tell her where park she told my wife I hadn't listened blankety-blank husband…"

last visit we borrowed a suitcase handle damaged baggage handling she had repaired we paid get fixed meantime she damaged interior our car she borrowed never mentioned
Then my wife wonders why I resent my mother-in-law.

woman constantly criticizes her nieces bad lifestyles yet she never talks her two kids crack addict steals his dad living-on-the-fringe daughter imprisoned twice credit card theft fraud.

I try polite her constant bad behavior puts a damper my best intentions doesn't help I don't a sparkling personality myself I a reprieve until Christmas Help me get under control before then!

Kirk

Kirk we don't believe rewarding bad behavior good treatment only discourage bad behavior worsens seen yourself polite mother-in-law's behavior getting worse.

thrust a boxing ring against honorable boxer wouldn't hit unwilling person mother-in-law hits below belt throws kidney punches bites clinches had enough provocation least defend yourself

can't change her can change how deal her may mean fighting fire fire may sound harsh when mother-in-law criticizes inquire her daughter turning her life around When she accuses things haven't done ask her son's rehab.

a subtle level could give her books how a good guest a good friend a good person She could also use a good book manners mother-in-law needs understand negative comments life met negative comments her life token meet any positives her positives

Self-centered people view politeness good manners others a weakness can exploit There only one strategy likely work a Christmas mother-in-law remember.

Wayne & Tamara

Authors columnists Wayne Tamara Mitchell can reached at
www.WayneAndTamara.com

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