Direct Answers Wayne Tamara Two years ago I divorced there still a lot hostility My former husband served contempt papers paying child support He says I sending him poorhouse I recourse contact court when payments stop He continues blame me even though two judges explained court determines when contempt charges filed My children require necessities life I provide he says children my responsibility contact him even ill He only interacts scheduled weekends times weekends cut short The home he purchased his girlfriend includes a built-in swimming pool two Jacuzzis Last summer he asked me how feels work he explained he makes enough money his girlfriend gets sit pool summer His girlfriend looks a glittering Christmas tree jewellery she wears I tried talk him he says he listening then belittles me He buys food clothing his girlfriend's children he tells me I messed up our children's lives dress rags true really great kids doing well school I need ideas how try talk him get my point across How I communicate my concerns him? Marlene Marlene communicated concerns him He doesn't care ex-husband doesn't want support any woman he sleeping her children children lost a father figure because father does see himself father There another danger here Children often respect bad parent respond parent wants disrespecting good parent simply pick up difficult parent's attitude; think placating him get a father response out him end result may blame Don't waste time thinking ever get being emotionally battered children a good reason minimize contact him His obligation his children comes state way state determines side road drive when pay taxes Let state enforce obligation don't explain apologize Wayne & Tamara Overreaction My best friend lives across street Her daughter mine play together time Our husbands best friends we watch over other's home when we out town. When she got a part-time job I started baby sitting her daughter I had interview one evening left my daughter hers my husband I gone one hour next day she called me told me a sudden she doesn't trust my husband her daughter. My husband elementary school teacher loves children upset me hurt my feelings She doesn't call now I wish I knew she thinking Should I call first? Christa Christa neighbour mad question why something actually occurred she likely acted immediately. She could angry because hour she didn't know watching her child because didn't share news interview her former can apologize Tell her didn't think husband watches children didn't dawn let her know Finally don't put yourself husband position her again. Tamara Authors columnists Wayne Tamara Mitchell can reached www.WayneAndTamara.com. | 